Fruit Sandwich #2: A Taste of My Childhood

Based on the times I’ve mentioned my mom on this site, you probably have the impression that I am a gigantic idiot manchild who doesn’t appreciate the woman who gave him life. And you’d be half right. I am a gigantic idiot manchild, but I do appreciate Mom, even if I give her a hard time now and then.

“Poor me, my mom made me eat green beans as a kid.” “Waaaah, my mom mixed peas into her spaghetti and freaked me out.” Well it wasn’t all chop suey and shit on a shingle, kids. My mom is a pretty great cook and taught me a lot of what I know in the kitchen.

This sandwich is one that my mom used to send to school with me when I was younger. I’m not sure if she made it up herself or got it from a recipe book or one of her friends–the World Wide Web wasn’t around back then, so methods of recipe propagation were more analog–but the most important thing about it is Mom’s banana bread. (Accept no substitutes!)

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Mom’s Banana Bread

Banana bread

Course Snack

Cuisine American

Keyword banana bread

Prep Time 20 minutes minutes

Cook Time 45 minutes minutes

Servings 12 slices

Calories 200kcal

Author Jim’s Mom

Ingredients

• 1 C sugar
• 1/2 C butter
• 1 egg
• 1/2 C buttermilk use sour milk if you don’t have any on hand
• 2 C flour
• 1 tsp baking powder
• 1/2 tsp baking soda
• 1 tsp vanilla extract
• 2 very ripe bananas soft, brown ones
• 1/2 C nuts optional
• brown sugar and cinnamon

Instructions

• Cream sugar and butter together
• Add the egg, beaten. Mix
• Combine all dry ingredients in a separate bowl
• Alternate between adding the buttermilk and dry ingredients, stirring until all combined.
• Add vanilla
• Mash up bananas and add
• Add nuts if using
• Add batter to loaf pan(s). Sprinkle a little brown sugar and cinnamon on top
• Bake at 325 for 45 minutes (2 small loaf pans) or 1 hour (1 large loaf pan). Test center with toothpick for doneness.

Notes

• Makes enough for 1 large loaf pan or 2 small ones

I didn’t follow Mom’s instructions *exactly*–I used 3 bananas instead of 2. Also, I skipped the nuts. A note on sour milk: to substitute for buttermilk you can mix regular milk with a little acid. I used the juice of half a small lime with a half cup of milk.

Now, that banana bread is going to be pretty soft when it comes right out of the oven, so you’ll need to wait for it to cool off before you do anything with it.

OK maybe just cut a little piece off the end to tide yourself over.

Now, banana bread by itself isn’t a sandwich, no matter how delicious it is. We need a filling.

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Mom’s Cream Cheese Pineapple Spread

Cream cheese and crushed pineapple

Course Snack

Cuisine American

Keyword cream cheese, pineapple, spread

Prep Time 5 minutes minutes

Total Time 5 minutes minutes

Servings 20 ounces

Calories 49kcal

Author Jim’s Mom

Ingredients

• 1 can crushed pineapple
• 1 package cream cheese
• cinnamon

Instructions

• Let the cream cheese come to room temperature so it mixes better
• Drain the crushed pineapple, reserving the juice
• Mix the pineapple into the cream cheese. Add a little juice to get the consistency you want but you probably won’t need to.
• Mix in just a bit of cinnamon.
• Use the rest of the juice to make a cocktail. (This is my recommendation, not Mom’s)

Notes

• Spread it on banana bread and ignore the haters

Now, I will admit that is not the most appetizing looking stuff in the world. It kind of looks like a baby was force-fed cottage cheese until it puked. Trust me though, this is the good stuff.

Now. Making the sandwich is easy. You let the banana bread cool off without eating it all, right? If not, I’ll wait.

OK, slice yourself off a couple pieces of banana bread.

Spread the pineapple cream cheese on one of them.

Now put those halves together.

That’s it! You’re done! Eat the thing.

There are differing textures throughout–especially if you use nuts in the bread, which I did not today–the crunchy layer of brown sugar on top, the firm edges of the bread giving way to the softer middle, the occasional chunk of banana, the creaminess of the spread with frequent sharply tart bits of pineapple. It’s a masterwork.

I ate this sandwich for lunch regularly well into my high school years. Kids around me would be dabbing the grease off their cafeteria pizza or dipping soggy fries into Ranch dressing and laughing at me for eating a kid’s sandwich. Those guys may be doctors or lawyers or college professors these days but me, I’m an internationally recognized sandwich expert. Who’s laughing now, jerks? (Hint: it is me, because I am eating a delicious kid’s sandwich)

Jim Behymer

I like sandwiches.

I like a lot of other things too but sandwiches are pretty great